The return of me....

I've been working on my mental issues this week and this weekend. I may finally be feeling less moody and less down on myself. I know I haven't been in the right place in my head, but I've been working on that. I'm trying to tell myself nice things daily. I tried it a few months ago and gave it up, but I'm starting over. I want to give myself a fighting chance to be the person I know I want to be. I want to be happier and healthier.

I'm looking forward to this week. I have to work, of course, because I haven't won the darned lottery (YET), but...I'm making the best out of THAT situation. I can't control the crap that goes on--the people who appear to be doing other things than answering the phones, but I'm not going to worry about that too much. I'm not in charge. Someone else is. Until they give me the go ahead to worry about the phones, I'm only going to worry about me, not about others.

We're going camping with the family next weekend and that's going to be a great thing. I'm really, really looking forward to it. Getting out and about, enjoying being disconnected from cell phones, mp3 players, etc. I'm looking forward to that. I promised the boys that if I could get their Den leaders to agree to it, we'll all go out in the woods, close our eyes and listen to the sounds of the birds we'll hear out there. I also volunteered to be the MC on Saturday night at the campfire, when the boys are doing skits (this is a Cub Scout Family campout). I think I can handle it. Anyone who knows me, knows I have a big mouth. LOL! I'm going to have fun with it.

Tuesday and Thursday is karate. I wasn't in class last week due to Cubs and not feeling 100%, so this is going to be a good thing. I'm seeing my doctor on Wednesday and will have a good report from him, I hope. As of this past Friday, he said he was fairly satisfied with my progress. I'm happy to hear that. It means that I'm doing better at controlling things like sitting with my foot tucked up under my rear, etc. I'm consciously thinking about that and correcting it if I happen to find myself doing it. He also told me that I need to build up my upper and lower body strength as well as my core strength. I found a series of exercises in Self Magazine that are great for 'tush tighteners' and they also work the arms and legs as well. I just have to remember to do them on non-consecutive days. I want these exercises to work, so I have to work on them three days a week. Monday, Wednesday, Friday mornings, then Tuesday and Thursday are karate. This will work out. I'm going to ask another friend who teaches mixed martial arts classes if I can come in and work with him a couple of times to get some serious cardio work in. I think I finally got serious. I really do.

I was able to find a couple of things I wanted to find this week...I found my language CD so I can review my Korean for class. I also found my other "foot" hidden in my closet tonight, so I have my complete sparring gear again. YAY! Now all I need to do is to get a mouth guard and I think we have one hiding around here somewhere. I'm almost prepared. My next step is to get myself physically fit and I'll feel better. I've decided that I need to get off my (bleep!) and start working on myself. I will feel better and will have a lot more self confidence.